Don’t find solace in many activities, things, or people anymore. Don’t feel the same anymore. Growing more irritable toward people. Easily detached. What to do. Find new things to do? New acquaintances who can bring out a different side of me. A bit tired of playing the same role. Perhaps time to reinvent myself. In a new place. of town.

So this is why people grow apart. You change and you want to play a new role. I guess marriages that last last because you help each other grow, instead of escaping to other things and people for a new tune.

I think it’s time I took on a new role. A new character. A new face. a new eye. a new heart.

You really can’t take risks in life until you face death. and stare at it. and grasp all that it means. where tomorrow is never guaranteed.

if the world where to end tomorrow, all i would care about today was praying to god and spreading his gospel to my family and friends. because that is all that matters in the end. and it hits you that that is all that ever mattered since there was a beginning. since forever. and i forget that – that exactly, is how i should live. why live for tomorrow, when you can live for eternity.

why would mankind be plagued with dreams of eternity if it didn’t exist? what would be the point? if we all died and there was nothing to it in the end? what exactly would be the point of that need to dream of it? a yearning for what was lost – it’s not a dream, but a memory of what was lost.

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